One week to go today until Christmas. For many of us, this means th
at we are in the thick of it. Social events, gifts, planning, food, school holidays, family, heightened emotions and did I say planning... soooo much planning. This can lead to feelings of anxiousness and overwhelm for many of us and it can take the shine out of Christmas. I know this week you will not have a lot of time to read (or to spend on yourself) so our blog this week will be short and sweet to help you circumvent these feelings and get out of this state so you can be more present and enjoy Christmas more.
Signs of anxiety and overwhelm
Anxiousness and overwhelm both come from the family of emotions that sit under fear. When you feel these feelings, you are having a flight or fight response and choosing flight (or freeze). You probably have butterflies in your stomach, a racing mind, faster pulse rate and breating, difficulting quieting your thoughts, changes to eating or sleeping and you might even be shaking a bit or sweating. This is a side effect of cortisol and adrenaline being released in your body in response to a threat. The difference is that instead of having an external threat to our lives, what is causing us fear is our own thoughts about what might or could happen. Our brains, can't tell the difference and we end up in this strange place where we are worried about things which we are building up in our own minds. This happens to all of us, it is normal and the great news is - it is possible to get out of it.
Breathe it out?
When we are in this state, we are not able to think rationally or process emotions. Those parts of our brain are shut off and not accessible. We are being driven just by reaction and survival, nothing more. The great news is that our bodies have an emergency override built into them. A parachute if you like, and eveyone can access it with a few minutes... and that is to breathe. Slow and deep breaths from your diaphragm. Here are a few suggestions you can do in under 3 minutes.
The one minute challenge - Set a clock for 60 seconds, breathe normally and count how many breaths you are doing. At the end of the 60 seconds, set the timer again. Your challenge is to now halve the number of breaths you took last time. If safe, do it a third time and enjoy slower breaths.
Box breathing - Trace out a square, as you do the line up breath in for 3 seonds, trace the top of the box holding your breath for 3 seconds, on the down stroke breathe out for 3 seconds and at the bottom line back to the start hold your empty breath again for 3 seconds. Now repeat again using 4 seconds, then 5 and then 6. Keep going as long as you feel comfortable.
Once you have finished these exercises, you sould be able to process some rational thoughts - work out what caused the episode and reflect on a way out of it.
Ground yourself
Another powerful option is something called grounding. This involves taking ourselves out of our problematic thoughts and grounding ourselves in the moment by getting in touch with our senses. Remember, in a state of overwhelm or anxiousness, the source of worry is your thoughts, so you need to come back to the moment where these thoughts don't exist to gain a sense of calm.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1 - This is a really simple one. Start off by looking around you and identifying 5 things you can see (say it out loud), then reach out and touch 4 things, naming them as you go. Pause and listen and call out 3 things you can hear. Pause again and see 2 things you can smell. Identify them and be specific. Finally call out one thing you can taste (if the answer to this is bitter or metal, chances are you are tasting adrenaline and that is OK, no need to worry - you now know what that is).
So if you find yourself a little overwhelmed this week, stressed or worried, know you are not alone. Stop what you are doing and take a few minutes to do one of these exercises and feel a little calmer. Our free tool this Thursday will have some extra suggestions to help you in the moment too.
If these feelings persist into the new year, it might be time to have a chat with someone to help work through some feelings and maybe look at other exercises such as Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) or Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to help address and change some of the underlying thought processes and change them, so they serve you better.
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